Mentally Done

I am so tired! Work has been very exhausting. From doing the ordering for the whole practice - and just trying to stay sain- - I am just mentally done! Have you ever gotten the feeling where you just want to crawl in a hole and hit the rewind button? My brain is so stacked with responsibility - that I get overwelmed. There are 20 women in this practice, and a couple of them are just waiting for me to fail. Every night I go home and say, " Okay, tomorrow will be a better day and I will just keep my mouth shut - not say a word!" But, I do and htan I go home that very same night feeling that very same way! Ughhhhhhhhhhhh. Did I tell you how excited I am to not hear my neighbor SLAM his door shut every hour? Sometimes I imagine myself going out there and saying, "I HAVE A BABY THAT IS TRYING TO SLEEP, MUST YOU SLAM YOUR DOOR LIKE HARRY AND THE HENDERSONS????" Than I think twice and remember I am 5 foot 2 inches tall - a little on the chubby side... I am not as threatening as I seem..... Dang! On a positive note... our apprasil came in at 2,000 dollars over what we purchased it for - so we are home free there! Not the underwriter goes to town.... Lord, please give us a nice underwriter! Tomorrow- is a new day and I will go in there shut my mouth and just putz along! I think I can, I think I can! I'll let ya know!

Nothing Better To Do But Blog

In the midst of panic mode packing to get the condo ready for rent - we packed my books, bibles, studies, and my ereader.... So this leaves me with nothing else to do but blog! I have nothing to write in either... stupid of me. Look at sweet Samantha riding in her Jeep the wrong way. I love how her little blonde hair is sprouting through!
If everything goes smoothly - this is where Scott, Samantha and I will cozy on in and spend many years together. We are now in the terrible process of paper work and signing your life away. The apprasial (I know I did not spell that right Ma) has been ordered, the property management company has been contacted... Now we must sit and wait. I am not a very patient person - so this will be a long month. But, this week Scott has a well deserved vacation from work,Friday is SMC's 32nd birthday, Saturday School starts (hopefully), the next weekend is the sweet baby shower for Millie and Kelli, and than my 22nd birthday! Hopefully I will be moving into a house shortly after or even on my Birthday!
Sam decided to help with the move to storage by taking out all, and I mean ALL of the DVD's. So helpful... Tonight Sam and I enjoyed so Spasssghetti at Aunt Kelli, Uncle Bryan, and Cousin Sophie and Clara's house. Sam decided to lean forward in her chair and end up on the floor... oh so many spills and falls to come. I guess that's the joy of parenting!
I must admit I will miss our sweet (easy to clean) condo. I will not miss those stairs though! I have taken a couple of spills that have left me bruised! I love our Condo the most in the fall - so at least I will get one last breath of that fresh, crisp, golf course air one last time.
I will miss Sam's first bedroom. I asked Scott to paint it this pretty green while I was in Washington State with my Ma... and he did it! I got home, ran to the room and was so thrilled with the result - and could not wait to put fairies, silly pictures, and build my little ones crib. Now, we must paint over with white paint, take down the pictures, and it'll probably turn into an office or maybe another child's bedroom? Is it wierd that I have an attatchment to this place?
This is the place where we can eat our meals and be a family. I requested no TV during dinner because the TV will be so easily watchable - Scott agreed and has already put my request into effect. Hopefully for Miss Sam's 1st Birthday - we can have the Mastons/Parks/Campbells over for Ice cream and cake. Sam will be happy to see all her family in one spot!
Have you met little Millie Rose yet? She looks just like Clara Belle did when she was a wee one! Millie is going to have my middle name. It is a family name, I must admit I was very thrilled when that decision was made. Mille will be arriving right around Sam's first Birthday! Sam and I will head over to the Park Pep Squad house to help with little one and maybe even take the girls home with me for a fairy princess sleep over if their mommy lets me. I have to admit, I sit in bed at night and think about all the fun things we shall do while their mommy and daddy soak up Little MRP. Popcorn, Tinkerbelle, Ice Cream, and lots of running and jumping!


You must turn your labtop 180 degrees to view this picture due to my laziness! Well, I'm off to bed - Sam wakes up at 7 a.m. and is rarin' to go! Good Night... Maybe this blog thing will continue a couple more nights.
XOXO

I Vow....

I vow to no longer google symptoms I am having. I vow to keep a consistent bible study. I vow to try and control my anxiety.

And I'm Back.... at least for today

- Yes, I am a royal blog slacker. I guess life has gotten to be very busy lately. I think I also got a tad bit frustrated because my postings became shorter and shorter with less and less to entertain with. Life has been a crazy fun house... I work Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesdays - 6:30 - 6:00. Scott work Thursday - Monday 9 - 7 most days. So that leaves..... small amounts of time together. Which leads me with more alone time which means more time to think. Don't get me wrong... thinking time is good, but when you're over thinking every single detail... it gets a little exhausting for this hypochondriac... By the end of my work day... I'm beat and ready for my bed. Than when I wake it's time to worry about liver failure (I know it's so stupid!), MS, basically you name it... I've got it. Ugh it's so exhausting... when will it end right? I hope poor Sam does not inherit my hypo ways....

Artichoke Dip

Watching Julie and Julia has inspired me... I am going to step outside my box, and start making a bigger variety of foods. This weeks exciting new trial... Artichoke dip.... I'll keep you updated....

Change and Icky Flu

Look at little Miss Sam I Am! She has changed so much already! This picture was taken in the hospital, and she's already changed so much! She def. has some light skin like her mama now, and those blue eyes.... EVEN BLUE-ER! Those chubby cheeks haven't changed! She's such a happy girl! Every morning when you go to get her out of her crib, she gives you the biggest smile and giggles! It makes every morning like Christmas Morning. Scott and I race to see who can get the first smile of the day! Yesterday I got the priv. of getting my hair done and little Miss Sam sure did put a number on the hair lady! Such a little doll! Now? She's taking a nap in her swing borrowed from Aunt Kelli and Clara. Scott? In bed - looking worse as ever with the stomach bug that Miss Sam and I just recovered from. I think Men are getting the sickness worse? Scott looks like death, and it's been a challenge getting him to keep hydrated. Hmmm. Another reason, I can NOT wait till Spring. Open doors, fresh air, pretty flowers, and NO FLU bugs! Sam and I can take short walks, go lay a blanket on the grass and bask (sp?) in the cool spring air. Ahhhh I got glimpse of it the other day and I have to say the Vit. D made a difference. Why can't it always be spring and fall.... just alternate... Winter and Hot Summer... I could do without.... For now? I am in my pretend world of daisies and cool but warm air..... There's no place like Sping... There's no place like Spring???? Didn't work!

Down

Sometimes your emotions get the best of you, and when you're emotions get the best of you, everyone handles it differently. Me? When I'm stressed, sad, or mad... I need comfort and communication. Scott? Stands quiet and likes to think to himself. It makes me sad when we get into bed and he turns the other way and says good night... That's it? I always think. I guess I knew that marriage isn't all butterflies and rainbows... But, I guess I kind of expected to be recognized a little more. I make the store runs, work 36 hour weeks, clean the house, and do the laundry... Yes, Scott pulls his weight around here too. But isn't there something inside of him that thinks his wife deserves a little more than the bare minimum? So, when I feel over welmed and I communicate it with him, why does he not give me any response. Doesn't it concern him that his wife is hurting in some way? I guess I am more of a feeler... If I see that he is stressed or upset I want to communicate and help him feel better. I guess Scott thinks that it's something that I need to work out on my own. I didn't get married to work things out on my own. How does this work? How do you meet in the middle? Sometimes I feel that Scott could have married anyone and been completely happy... He's so easy to get along with that any marriage would have been fine. Am I just a place holder? Now, I know this isn't true but sometimes this is how I feel, and aren't my feelings coming from somewhere? Shouldn't they make him a little concerned and want to help?